Have you ever noticed when you have a team conversation, and agreement seems to be reached?
Beware! There will be a sidle. Watch for it, be prepared for it. Don’t avoid it.
What is the sidle? The sidle is simply, one person who hangs back … the conversation after the conversation; the hallway conversation; the kitchen cup-o-tea conversation.
This is vitally important to realise, to prepare for as a leader. The sidle could indicate many things;
- Perhaps the person is uncomfortable sharing their thought / question with everyone.
- Perhaps there’s a hidden agenda.
- There’s a question that wasn’t asked that is burning.
- There’s a reliance on you as a leader to communicate – and you haven’t.
Whilst agreement seems to be reached in the meeting – it’s the conversation after the conversation that can make the difference. A wiser person than I mentioned that there would always be questions. Wait. If there’s none, wait some more. There will be questions in the room.
The sidle used to irritate me. I used to feel so frustrated, because in me there would be a sense of urgency. I felt like I had ‘dealt with the issue’ in the room – and it was now time to move on.
I’ve learned since – that this feeling is my feeling. If there is a sidle (and there usually is) then it is a good thing. I can help this person. I can encourage the person, help them with the question.
Given the sidle is time expensive – and we are in a world that tends to rush from meeting to meeting … How do you deal with the sidle?